Friday, June 03, 2005 A.D.
Veni, Vidi, Vomit
Pervasively present Kris Aquino announces her engagement to twenty-three year old ballplayer James Yap today. As if this wasn't interesting enough, this announcement came a few days after fellow poor little rich girl Paris Hilton's engagement.

If anything, Kris' hemorrhoid-inducing omnipresence has pushed me into learning Zen calming techniques, particularly that of clenching and unclenching my sphincters in time with the universe. I can sympathize with the congresswoman who wanted to have Kris' Bench billboard (beside the Quezon Ave. flyover) torn down due to being indecent, but I do like to tell her that the billboard isn't the indecent party involved at all. You can surround Kris with rainbows, teddy bears and fluffy clouds, dress her up like Mother Teresa, have her pose with Barney and a boys choir, and the resulting photo will still be indecent.

There's also something markedly wrong how ad agencies can think of remaking Kris' image into that of a sex symbol's. I know she has lots of unresolved issues, but I doubt that they can be worked out by epidermal overexposure anyway. It is her right as it is anyone's, I guess, having probably discovered plastic surgery and how to finally be confident about her sexuality (was she ever unconfident?) , but I know I would feel more comfortable if she didn't flaunt her rights for the world to see, especially not via a giant billboard that I have to pass by everyday on my way home.


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Comments:
That girl ought to have some kind of karma hit her hard on the head (or maybe a big fat slap will do). She has no idea what privacy is. I swear!

I have reason to say that she is a slut and that it's because of women like her that some men think they can get away with treating women badly.

If you do decide to waste your time on making her life miserable (or at least do something to her to help end OUR misery), do tell me. I will gladly help out.

Her father is turning over in his grave, I'm sure.
 
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when i look at that billboard, i get the same feeling as when i'd watched "house of 1000 corpses": distURBed with a capital URB.
 
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i feeling for you frend, i feeling for yours predicament. alone not are you on this one.
 
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it's not like i'm wishing for it or anything but i wouldn't be surprised if she comes out again complaining she's a battered fiance or wife or something...
and well, she's just too in love with herself. i dunno. blech.
 
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Had I known that posting about Kristina Bernadette Cojuangco Aquino will generate this many hits, I'd have started a fanpage and revelled in all the hate mail instead.
 
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Canine-eradicated volatilized decimated corroded monstrous
The vocal few (in this case, the vocal writers) do not a nation's verdict shape as the silent majority who have all the reasons to wallow upon. The Filipinos' well-earned reputation abroad as overseas-workers par excellence is sadly volatilized, decimated, corroded & juxtaposed by Filipinos' penchant for obstructionism, divisiveness destabilization, envy, hatred & primarily, crab mentality, such as what this blog entry, along with its rabid, canine & blood-thirsty supporters had shown.
If you think you are nay better than the advertising, tv & film think-tanks, then think again. Why couldn't you volunteer yourselves to be their rightful models & stars or why is it that despite your passion & proddings, you will never qualify & they will never get you? Because you seem to possess the holier than thou attitude, one so typical of the old biblical hypocrites (Beatas) driven to flaunt their heroic & religious deeds to the satisfaction of their blighted, bloated souls, egos & constituents but to the consternation of God.
One quick comic relief: A priest in our barrio once asked the congregation attending the mass if there is anyone present who could categorically admit that he/she has not sinned in his lifetime. A prominent member of a Catholic Women's League coyly raised her right hand, her face covered with a veil & retorted: "Ako Po Padre"! Silence initially gripped her reply only to morph into a monstrous laughter. The priest then turned to the public & said, I could not agree with you any better! Then he continued, if I as a priest would acknowledge committing some mistakes, I could not see anybody here contesting God's perfection, unless one is out of her mind or hallucinating!
The moral of the story? Wake up beatas, though the world would be better-off with you sleeping all the time, it would even be better without you. That way, the Philippines, the only country I have & would love to end up with, will find her chance at development & progress. Otherwise, for the Philippines to evolve into a Tiger, instead of forever being relegated economically as the Sick man of Asia or more sadly, the Earthworm of Asia, your kind & ilk must commit genocide to emasculate & overhaul the mentality or state of mind of the Filipinos. Then & only then would we progress as a country! Mabuhay kapwa Pilipino!
For your information, the Philippines is better off with people such as Ms. kris Aquino-transparent, honest, sincere even to her own deconstruction or destruction. After all, what is essential is for one to admit that he/she has made mistakes, resolve not to do it again & rise up from the debacles to emerge a stronger, better person. What doesnt kill makes one as such, isn't it? Likewise, one has to be broken to be whole again, so long as such predicament is not intentional. Mpreover, we must admit, that "the greatest glory of a man is not in never falling, but in rising again, everytuime he falls! Congrats Ms. kris, especially with your impending marriage to James Yap. With such moral, legal union, the world will embrace you more!!!

Francisco D. Valmoria, Jr.
Hawally, Kuwait
Tel no. (+965) (2623698/6338173/6053046)
 
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The vocal few (in this case, the vocal writers) do not a nation's verdict shape as the silent majority who have all the reasons to wallow upon. The Filipinos' well-earned reputation abroad as overseas-workers par excellence is sadly volatilized, decimated, corroded & juxtaposed by Filipinos' penchant for obstructionism, divisiveness, destabilization, envy, hatred & primarily, crab mentality, such as what this blog entry, along with its rabid, canine & blood-thirsty supporters had shown.
If you think you are any better than the advertising, tv & film think-tanks, then think again. Why couldn't you volunteer yourselves to be their rightful models & stars or why is it that despite your passion & proddings, you will never qualify & they will never get you? Because you seem to possess the holier than thou attitude, one so typical of the old biblical hypocrites (Beatas) driven to flaunt their heroic & religious deeds to the satisfaction of their blighted, bloated souls, egos & constituents but to the consternation of God.
One quick comic relief: A priest in our barrio once asked the congregation attending the mass if there is anyone present who could categorically admit that he/she has not sinned in his lifetime. A prominent member of a Catholic Women's League coyly raised her right hand, her face covered with a veil & retorted: "Ako Po Padre"! Silence initially gripped her reply only to morph into a monstrous laughter. The priest then turned to the public & said, I could not agree with you any better! Then he continued, if I as a priest would acknowledge committing some mistakes, I could not see anybody here contesting God's perfection, unless one is out of her mind or hallucinating!
The moral of the story? Wake up beatas, though the world would be better-off with you sleeping all the time, it would even be better without you. That way, the Philippines, the only country I have & would love to end up with, will find her chance at development & progress. Otherwise, for the Philippines to evolve into a Tiger, instead of forever being relegated economically as the Sick man of Asia or more sadly, the Earthworm of Asia, your kind & ilk must commit genocide to emasculate & overhaul the mentality or state of mind of the present-day Filipinos. Then & only then would we progress as a country! Mabuhay mga bagong Pilipino!
 
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The vocal few (in this case, the vocal writers) do not a nation's verdict shape as the silent majority who have all the reasons to wallow upon. The Filipinos' well-earned reputation abroad as overseas-workers par excellence is sadly volatilized, decimated, corroded & juxtaposed by Filipinos' penchant for obstructionism, divisiveness, destabilization, envy, hatred & primarily, crab mentality, such as what this blog entry, along with its rabid, canine & blood-thirsty supporters had shown.
If you think you are any better than the advertising, tv & film think-tanks, then think again. Why couldn't you volunteer yourselves to be their rightful models & stars or why is it that despite your passion & proddings, you will never qualify & they will never get you? Because you seem to possess the holier than thou attitude, one so typical of the old biblical hypocrites (Beatas) driven to flaunt their heroic & religious deeds to the satisfaction of their blighted, bloated souls, egos & constituents but to the consternation of God.
One quick comic relief: A priest in our barrio once asked the congregation attending the mass if there is anyone present who could categorically admit that he/she has not sinned in his lifetime. A prominent member of a Catholic Women's League coyly raised her right hand, her face covered with a veil & retorted: "Ako Po Padre"! Silence initially gripped her reply only to morph into a monstrous laughter. The priest then turned to the public & said, I could not agree with you any better! Then he continued, if I as a priest would acknowledge committing some mistakes, I could not see anybody here contesting God's perfection, unless one is out of her mind or hallucinating!
The moral of the story? Wake up beatas, though the world would be better-off with you sleeping all the time, it would even be better without you. That way, the Philippines, the only country I have & would love to end up with, will find her chance at development & progress. Otherwise, for the Philippines to evolve into a Tiger, instead of forever being relegated economically as the Sick man of Asia or more sadly, the Earthworm of Asia, your kind & ilk must commit genocide to emasculate & overhaul the mentality or state of mind of the present-day Filipinos. Then & only then would we progress as a country! Mabuhay mga bagong Pilipino!
For your information, the Philippines is better off with people such as Ms. Kris Aquino - transparent, honest, sincere even to her own deconstruction or destruction. After all, what is essential is for one to admit that he/she has made mistakes, resolve not to do it again & rise up from the debacles to emerge a stronger, better person. What doesn't kill makes one as such, isn't it? Likewise, one has to be broken to be whole again, so long as such predicament is not intentional. Moreover, we must admit, that "the greatest glory of a man is not in never falling, but in rising again, every time he falls! Congrats Ms. Kris, especially with your impending marriage to James Yap. With such moral, legal union, you will find the world embracing you more!!!!

Francisco D. Valmoria, Jr.
Hawally, Kuwait
Tel no.: (+965) (2623698/6053046/6338173)
 
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Mr. Francisco D. Valmoria, Jr.

was your favorite movie growing up Pido Dida?
 
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Mr. Francisco D. Valmoria, Jr.

I have from time to time, appluaded Ms. Aquino on her frankness, spirit, clothes-sense, etc. etc.
But i cannot agree on what she does or how she behaves most of the time. As an example for the Filipina, she should show how to fight back when a lover becomes emotionally and physically abusive (or it might be the other way around...). After all the publicity and the grief the issue of her love affair with mr marquez, it was a time for an example for the Filipinas not to become martyrs anymore... And yet, after a few months, there we see our heroine crying and missing her lover. (yeah she's human, she's not perfect...) but she should think more about the consequences of her actions, if it were just her that was affected, then fine. but think of her poor mother, and how a pain in the ass she is. i am tired of hearing her admitting her mistakes and not doing anything about it. i can continue discussing in a thousand words or more, but i am tired. this feels like a discussion on a forum for THE BUZZ! so i'll just stop here and tell you some things that is worth more than a kris aquino-socio-political discussion.

there are a lot of other filipinos out there that make me proud that i am a filipina. point sir, if the philippines were populated by kris aquino clones, we'd be a land of designer clothing, twisted morals, coño-speak people. it'd be a nightmare for me and for a lot of filipinos. this rabid, canine & blood-thirsty person feels volatilized, decimated, corroded & juxtaposed (damn! i love your thesaurus... *seriously*) by your hatred (as shown by your comments to us and whoever)...

If you think that you're better than the shallow people that we are who cannot help but comment on the visuals that have disturbed us, then you seem to possess the holier than thou attitude, one so typical of the old biblical hypocrites (Beatas) driven to flaunt their heroic & religious deeds to the satisfaction of their blighted, bloated souls, egos & constituents but to the consternation of God.

please, don't you dare lecture a 3rd world laborer about love of country. keep your pompous thoughts to your pompous self. and, nice thesaurus... who published the one that your using?

feeling DISTURBED about her posters do not need your analysis. there are a lot of other things out there that would need dissecting of your brilliant mind.

kudos to your fabulous use of the english language (and don't forget the possible use of the internet and thesaurus...).

on a lighter note...
maari mo bang isalin ang mga naisulat mo dito sa ating sariling wika? marahil mas nararapat na tayo'y gumamit ng wikang tagalog sa pagdidiskusyon ng ating pagmamahal sa ating inang bansa.
 
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Thanks for visiting my blog Mr. Valmoria, for reading everything (apparently), including what I forgot to actually type in this entry. I hardly consider my original post a rabid one though, as I posted only once, with very few redundant terms at that.

It is a delight, however unsettling, for you to have actually discovered this blog as it is relatively new and I haven't exactly told a lot of people about it yet. It is a curious little detail, but I really have to know... how did you even end up here?

Anyhow, it wouldn't be very forthcoming of me to not address your post(s), as they do indeed raise some points.

Firstly, I never claimed to be better than the media folks you pointed out. I do find some of their decisions questionable however, particularly when they decide on what's best for the masa. There is a condescension to most of their decision-making concerning that target market, especially when they think that Filipinos generally suffer from low IQs and are all morally impressionable... there's your holier-than-thou attitude. I regret to inform you, dear sir, that that's how the local media actually works. Celebrity endorsements are nothing new in advertising, and they're arguably the easiest way to get your message across to your audience. They can be done tastefully, in which case they become quickie solutions, and crassly, in which case they easily become insults to the target audience's intelligence. I merely stated an opinion that I found some - not all - of Kris' recent endorsements to be more on the crass side of things, and I am sorry that you found it to be an affront to the plight of OFWs and a deterrent to the Philippines' economic growth. That you even found a connection between those and my initial post, I am doubly sorry.

As for Kris, I also think she is a very strong and outspoken person. Those traits, however admirable, can work both ways. I like to reserve judgment on her public missteps and how she handled the fallouts from those, but being strong and outspoken when in the wrong contexts can prove to be more damaging than not because whether she likes to think it or not, Kris is a role model to most. I'm not so sure about her sincerity, but she is indeed very transparent, although probably not as transparent as the top she wore for the billboard in question. Don't get me wrong though, I couldn't care less about her impending marriage to Mr. Yap. I would in fact be happy for her if she actually does finally find true love and true happiness with him. I would even be happier if in discovering such, she finally resolves her personal issues and stops behaving like the poor little rich girl everybody seems to think she is. Despite your rabid, canine and bloodthirsty remarks, I do believe that everyone can afford to be happy.

Lastly, as much as I like to just ignore some of your cheap shots, I should point out that you are the one suggesting for me and my ilk to commit genocide like some Hitler on hash. Don't you find it ironic that you have the tenacity to call me holier-than-thou? I cannot comprehend how you ended up being affected this much, at a personal blog of all things, when you yourself said that the 'vocal few' are hardly significant in shaping a nation. I like to think differently though, and I can back it up with historical research. I still don't get it how you can boldly brush the 'vocal few' aside and eventually connect a petty little posting to something as ginormous as the Philippines' chance at economic development.

You can post further, but I already dignified your cut-and-paste comments with a response, and I find it enough. I am not attacking you personally, so I find no reason why you should even think of doing that to me or to the few people who bothered to post comments here. I am not good with debates, unlike you (and you seem to be a master debater with a handy thesaurus), so I like to retire this issue with you. This is, after all, hardly a venue for such discussions. I wish you more power in whatever it is you like to do, and if I did intend to insult you, I apologize. I hope you can in turn forgive me for having an opinion and what some earthbound bipeds call a 'sense of humor.'

In the meantime, why don't you go through what else my site has to offer, like these links perhaps:

http://www.ratemyfinger.com/ratemy/finger
http://www.ratemyboobies.com/ratemy/boobies
http://www.ratemyboner.com/ratemy/boner
http://www.ratemypoo.com/ratemy/poo

Good day to you sir!
 
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correction...
MS Word Thesaurus pala! and google na rin... (not your usual thesaurus ang ginamit) ^_^...
 
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Hahahaha! Way the go ronan! I was astonished with all the blabbing from the very long and incoherent previous posts. I'm actually curious why Bench got Kris to pose for that ad. It's obviously a different look.
 
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Oooh! I'm starting to like your blog! :-)
 
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My dear anak,

Ronan, Ronan, Ronan. Kudos. Kudos to a hilarious blog entry on Kris Aquino (may she one day please just disappear from all above the line media formats) and to your witty, hilarious yet succinct (and subtly sharp) response to some of those who have commented on said entry.

Don't you just love the Philippines?! I swear, only in the Philippines...We can pretty much say or do anything we want. Where else can you have a prominent comedian poke fun at the country's president 24/7? (Ate Glow). Where else can you have reporters/newscasters "threaten" to expose every little evil thing about you? (Mon Tulfo).

I love it, I love it, I love it.

And kudos to all the other "little voices" that do speak up. Unlike some people, I believe that Filipinos tend to be too complacent and are chronically afflicted with short-term memory loss.

So little blog entries like these make my day :)

Cargo Frend and Raffy Frend told me about your blog, in case you were wondering.

Love,
Mother Cybs
 
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Oh goody! Thank you Anonymous a.k.a. Mr Francisco D. Valmoria, from Hawally, Kuwait with tel no. (+965) (2623698/6053046/6338173)! With your handy dandy thesaurus, you seem to have single-handedly saved the Philippines from ignorant Kris-Aquino-hating fools like me. You have put us all to shame.

Or maybe NOT.

While Ms. Aquino has her redeeming qualities (however.. few), she has somehow managed to saturate Philippine television with her whiny voice and her uncanny ability to reduce the IQ of the masses with each uttered word. This has enabled her to, in my opinion, cross the line from being tolerable, to you-make-me-sick sicko *vomit*. It takes a lot to suppress that feeling of panic everytime I see that (to follow Mr Valmoria's exceptional use of thesaurus.com) gigantic, enormous, vast, mammoth, colossal, titanic billboard of her sagging mammaries along EDSA. OH NO SHE'S EVERYWHEEEEREE!!! Her 'honest and sincere' confessions on television about her relationship with Joey Marquez, how she contracted a sexually transmitted disease from him, other gory details of her relationship? Is that supposed to make feel PROUD to be a Filipino? It's like saying Anna Nicole Smith should make all Americanos proud of their country. Puhleez.

Actually, ronan is right, we're giving Ms. Aquino and Isko here too much credit by wasting a couple of precious brain cells on them. Har di Har. Is da funny.
 
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Kris had been an important & daily fixture of Philippine mass media, especially via television, broadsheets, tabloids & the internet. In fact, we never fail to listen or retrieve any update about her from the net, since Kris constantly tickles the fancy & imagination of society's cross-section as she's the only one who effortlessly permeates into the impervious membranes & consciousness of those who abhor politics & showbiz.

With Kris' impending church wedding to James Yap, she does not only have showbiz & politics behind her, including those who are opposed to both worlds, but has also added to her surging bastion of supporters the sports aficionados & moralists around.

Kris has been well loved despite her shortcomings, because everybody knows that this girl was snatched not only of her childhood or her privacy, but most specially of the most important man in her life, the beloved Ninoy Aquino. If one has to put this into consideration, Kris' actuations in the past may have a lot to do in this respect.

People are sometimes so judgmental & mean to argue why we choose someone such as Kris, who had miserably failed in some legal & moral respects in the past to be our role model. Simple. Faith & even logic dictates that no one is perfect except God. Hence, our being & existence in this world must be a way of perfection to eventually find salvation & be in union with our creator, GOD. If one has to follow such rationale, isn't it believable that each of us who is conscious of meriting God's Kingdom in the end must at least assume to be God's work in progress? Perhaps, others may have the tendency to bloat & act as though they are holier than others, but lest we forget, only God has the right to judge, for as imperfect as we are, it is an insult to do so & would be tantamount to admitting that our delicadeza has a malnutrition problem of marasmus & kwashiorkor proportions!

Kris' special place in our heart is a result of her honesty, transparency & sincerity, traits that in some cases, put her at a disadvantage or in oblivion but to which she doesn't care, leaving her destiny & fate to the public & God every after public confession of any untoward controversies. Such traits are the ones which we had long hoped our politicians to imbibe to bring about transparent leadership, governance or bureaucracy. Sad to say, such has been found wanting not just from our political leaders of today, but among the majority of us.

Hence, Kris will always be a role-model for those of us who consider ourselves to be God's work in progress, for those of us who had faltered in the past but had vowed not to fall on the same trap once again. For those of us who trip several times but are ready to bounce back each time for our loved ones. For those of us who are neglected but try to find solace in our work to merit the respect of the judgmental majority. And most of all, to those of us who have the desire to contribute to the country's welfare by giving our best, experimenting at every opportunity offered, for those of us who try to make the best of our relationship work, regardless of the gravity that had ripped it apart because what we harbor at the end of the day is the grim reality & weapon of HOPE, as what Ms. Kris Aquino had always represented. Hope to be finally good, better & deserving of God's kingdom.

From experience, "what doesn't kill makes one a stronger, better person" and "sometimes, one has to be broken to be whole again", especially if such failures & mistakes are done unintentionally. After all, "the greatest glory of a man is not in never falling, but in rising again every time he falls". Jesus did stumble & rise-up 14 times as evidenced by the 14 stations of the cross. For us to stumble & rise up even once, twice or thrice in our life is indeed a great honor & step towards SALVATION & GLORY!

Francisco D. Valmoria, Jr.
 
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Anyway, what I'd really want to emphasize is for everyone not to lose hope. If we perceive or want Kris to advocate such mantra in life, it is because to a multitude of poverty-stricken Filipinos, HOPE plays a significant role in emancipating them from such bondage.

To take Kris, who's a high-profile figure & is supposedly devoid of such poverty-related human problems, as a role-model for God's continuing work in each & everyone of us works positively for the Filipinos' psyche, to the chagrin of pessimism & self-destruction. That is, if some past incidents had devastated Kris, supposedly a princess, then there's no question why its happening or will happen to the broader base of Filipinos - the poor or the masa.

Francisco D. Valmoria, Jr.
P.O.Box 6518, Code 32040, Hawally, Kuwait
Tel. No.: (+965) (2623698/6338173/6053046)
Fax No.: (+965) (2635869)
E-mail: bullfighter402000@yahoo.com
 
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