Monday, May 30, 2005 A.D.
Technical Issues or How I Learned to Love My Bladder
The doctor's instructions were simple... whenever I feel a slight irritation in the general area of my windpipe, I should just drink a glass of cold water. I have already downed eleven glasses so far. Not exempt from the biological principle of 'what comes in must go out,' I have been visiting the little boys' room every fifteen minutes or so, emptying my overworked bladder like I would a runny pressure tank. I caught the creepy technical support geezer checking into a cubicle once and caught him checking out only after I returned for another leak. That's a mother-load, I thought. I realized then that it's probably a big effort on his part to loose his bowels, having a sphincter that is obviously clenched tighter than a dam valve. It also takes a lot of exertion, probably, for him to extract his head from his rectum since it seems to have been lodged in pretty deep. I hope the doctor can prescribe me something for whenever I feel a slight irritation for his general person. For the meantime though, I'll just be drinking glass number twelve.


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